小咪&小安的家

3/11 update

 上完四週的課，覺得老公好棒
他是唯一一個四堂課都有參加的爸爸
第一堂課本來有一個跟我們情形很像的夫妻
(夫妻兩人對教養的意見常常不合)
那個爸爸第三堂課就沒來了
上完課後，老公現在比較願意花時間陪女兒
也終於開始享受到有小孩的“甜蜜”
之前最大的問題就是史小咪不願意跟爸爸玩
媽媽煮飯也一直抱著大腿不肯放
現在她不但願意跟爸爸玩
也可以自己待在教會的主日學
很棒的workshop呢

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帶安安去打疫苗時看到的資訊
今天第一次去參加，還蠻有趣的
總共有四次，各兩小時
這是網站上總結的十大tips
先紀錄下來

TOP 10 TIPS FOR PARENTS
http://www.triplep.net/cicms/assets/pdfs/pg1as100gr5so183.pdf

1. When your child wants to show you something, stop what you are doing and pay

attention to your child. It is important to spend frequent, small amounts of time

with your child doing things that you both enjoy.

→這需要很多的耐心啊，尤其是很需要時間做自己的事的時候

2. Give your child lots of physical affection – children often like hugs, cuddles, and

holding hands.

→爸爸，聽到了沒有…

3. Talk to your child about things he/she is interested in and share aspects of your

day with your child.

→嗯，這也是為什麼我們家餐桌從電腦桌改到廚房的原因

4. Give your child lots of descriptive praise when they do something that you would

like to see more of, e.g., “Thank you for doing what I asked straight away”.

→重點是"descriptive"，研究証明這很重要

5. Children are more likely to misbehave when they are bored so provide lots of

engaging indoor and outdoor activities for your child, e.g., playdough, colouring

in, cardboard boxes, dress ups, cubby houses, etc.

→如果孩子的爸不想花錢買玩具怎辦？

6. Teach your child new skills by first showing the skill yourself, then giving your

child opportunities to learn the new skill. For example, speak politely to each

other in the home. Then, prompt your child to speak politely (e.g., say “please”

or “thank you”), and praise your child for their efforts.

→大家都知道，身教重於言教啊…

7. Set clear limits on your child’s behaviour. Sit down and have a family discussion

on the rules in the home. Let your child know what the consequences will be if

they break the rules.

→這點需要跟孩子的爸好好討論討論…

8. If your child misbehaves, stay calm and give them a clear instruction to stop

misbehaving and tell them what you would like them to do instead (e.g., “Stop

fighting; play nicely with each other.” Praise your child if they stop. If they do not

stop, follow through with an appropriate consequence.

→唉，有時候很難stay calm呀，問題是…

9. Have realistic expectations. All children misbehave at times and it is inevitable

that you will have some discipline hassles. Trying to be the perfect parent can set

you up for frustration and disappointment.

→如何界定"realistic expectation"呢？

10. Look after yourself. It is difficult to be a calm, relaxed parent if you are stressed,

anxious, or depressed. Try to find time every week to let yourself unwind or do

something that you enjoy.

→如果孩子的爸需要每天都要有三個小時以上的own time才不會stressed，那怎麼辦？